Whie

I looked at you and I saw the beauty that you didn't see
I looked at you in hope that you would look back and see the beauty in me
I don't know if you notice
Or care
But I secretly love you
Ps. Your hair!
Your eyes...oh laward
The smile you give when you walk in the door
The dimples I touch jokingly
But I truly mean
Your joking "I love you"
And my jokin response "shut up dude but I love you too"
I kinda want to tell you that
But I don't work up the courage
So I keep it inside
Almost in the same place that my emotions hide
My emotions for you ,I think, are true
But I would never know because I'm not sure you love me too. I don't think I can ask you. I don't want to loose you so
I guess your just
                        Cool

My reach

I keep falling away from your grip
I keep having you just within my reach but still too far away for me to grab
Once I finally hold on its like my hand gets all weak and starts to shake
I let go and i fail but still you wait there for me to catch up again.
Time and time again I would slip away
But time after time again I would catch up and keep up
Then all of a sudden my legs an hands would give up and I would fall.
But still you waited for me to come back and catch up
No matter how long I gave up for you would still be there. I am so confused. Why would you still wait for me if you knew I would just fall and not be able be catch up. Then finally you said something after periods of silence you told me that this time when I caught up you would be sure I stayed. So I gave my all and I caught up. I did it. And I'm sure that this time I won't let my legs or hands slip. I grabbed a hold of you and I held on as hard as I could.

No longer

The things my eyes have seen are way past the matter of my being. I guess you would say they have no bigger meaning, but that's your point of view. You see it's not your cup of tea, a normal cup of joe for me. You just don't know. I have been laying here for quite some time thinking about what this all ment. I lament for all this wrong doing even though I'm not affiliated with all this unappreciated madness that I can't escape from this I can't awake from this its too  surreal for me to handle well. It's not a dream anymore. I need to get out but I can't find an open door. I am locked in here, shut in forever. I'm held within. Isn't this a crime I mean come on look at the time I have been in here for going on 6 years. I'm drowning in my own tears. If I would have known what that one choice would have done.....

Beautyful

This poem is fo school i hpe it sounds cool

you are a precious jewl

dont believe all those mean people they're just cruel

All those things that made you cry...yeah dont believe them they are all lies

You are

           Beautiful

           Empowered

           Amazing

           Usefull

           Time for

           You to

           Forget

      yoUr not

worthLess

Fade Away

She wanted to fade away everyday. Nobody knew so nobody stayed. She made sure she kept it inside all her emotions had to hide. She had never lied its just that no one tried to get inside and realize that she had died. Everything has gotten bad once again,she said inside her haed all these lies there tearing me up inside she had no one that she could confide she needed a guide that would stay by her side. Who had acctully tried to get inside she had to sbide in him. This person who was really great he knew her fate. She couldnt wait to open up this new life gate,and when she did she kept on track was happy and never did go back.

Love

They said that the love would never die. I think there worng cuz it made him cry. Everyday he went through a lot of pain just so then in the end he would take the blame after getting called so many names, he played many games. But the happiness never came. He would look at him with such a twinkle in his eye but this whole "relationship" was just a big lie. The guy, he said goodbye he said it was over,and now so was his life. He gave everything to be together his pain was more than anyone could measure. He wanted to forget what just happened. He said he must find a way to forget this day,get rid of this pain,he didnt know what to do,he searched for something that would make it better, what would make him feel new, without all this pain. He wanted to forget those harsh names all those games he played. He laid down and never wanted to get up,and so he just quit,he never once got up.

MY dear

Why she cried am i alive, i just want to crawl in a hole and die...no no my dear thats all a big lie your the reason that i died,i spread out my arms oh so wide held out a peace sign was stabed then i died, all because people lied and they where going to die but i wanted them to live a very long life...thats all wrong, you dont love me...no dear dont you see im here to get rid of your pain and give you a new name...ha give me a new name and get rid of my pain i can barely live another day...may i tell you why your here,my dear he was filled with fear, he would of died if you wernt alive, you showed me to him, hes new because of you, can you see that change you made him make, all this isnt fake you where made to make this life change for just one person, and you know his name, thats the reason that you came and if you trust in me i can rid your pain...wow she said, this is such a gain i wont have to be here in vane...thats right my dear i am forever here...okay i guess this is for the best...yes my dear i wont be a guest,this is surely the best my dear i love you and dont ever forget

Someone once told her

If you look past the layer of shine in her eyes you can see that they tell marvalous lies,all this time you never saw the hurt inside,well she cries almost everynight she cant take the pain that calles out her name she lost this life game or so she could comprehend,someone once said to her life is like a marathon you have to keep going over obstical and the people who hand you water are the people who will always be there,you cant sprint tho,to the end that is,and imedeatly her mind went to the dark side she thought in her innerside it can be,if i commit suicide then i could say goodbye and i would be to the end of my life,as someone once said to her,someone once told her to be strong it'll all be over,someone once told her that she was perfect just the way she was then turned around and told her she wasnt worth a piece of fuzz,she missed who she was,that happy go lucky girl who loved the world,but someone once told her to go ahead and go for the door since you cant do more,and that she did,on that night she was no more

Goodbye

One by one they'll fade away so make a new one everyday,just put on a smile and hold it for a while,everything will be ok one day youll be gone,then this world cant do you no more rong,just try to stay strong now go home and make them "laugh" so they will forget your past,then take a long shower to let it all out,dont let them hear your shouts,ok now go to your room and shut the door,cry some more,now take the pain out on your theighs,because you dont believe that they are all lies,leave a note to say goodbye and tell them not to cry and this is why:youll be happier up there where you dont have to cry,or have a face that tells so maney lies,then tell them you loved them,and you had to go,and that your sorry you couldent put on this show.

She is "alright"

Her eyes tell maney lies,her smile can hide the pain that she feels inside,her mouth tells people she is alright,her hands they grabe the knife,her theighs they accept the lies,but remember she is alright,her hair she pulls it up,her fingers help throw it up,her mind thinks about suicide,but remember she is alright,she writes maney lines about how she cries or cuts deep in her theighs,but remember she is alright

To my sun ray

To my sun ray

I look at you every day wondering how we ever got so far away. I remember when everyday it was good to see your happy face...it makes me smile but after a while I notice that I'm smiling and I start filing through the memories of you and me...se I can't go another day.....never mind I remember we both wanted to say that we were walking away.....guess what I never meant it that day...so today I will say that I am walking away....goodbye my sun ray......

My story

She needed his love...not the one you thinking of...I'm talking about the one above. The one who made her did you know that he laid down his life for her...she would later find her savior and that was the day her life spilled out and she was full of doubts that she was worth it...lemme tell you her story.....the story somewhat from birth......she was born in a home where it was god alone she went to church every Sunday and she loved it this way...she went outside to play literally everyday she had good faith until one day something happened that I will not say because I really don't want to remember those days let's just say it caused her great pain....her life was scared and she didn't want to believe in god....well she went to kids camp and "changed" went home and everything was the same. She still had little faith and forgot about god. It was time for her to go to youth camp and she had to go alone time for her to find a new group. It was the day she sat in her room and waited for what would later be her new youth group...they finally drove up and now it seemed like it was going to be fun and it was. It flied by oh so fast she tried to let go of what happened in her past but the happy feeling didn't last. She went home and after about a week or so she finally had a youth group it was really neat she had a new seat in a where she would later reunite with her savior... she stayed with this group for about three months then the day came where her life changed...she was talking to her pastor and her life spilled out it was full of doubt that Jesus was still there and that he cared....she waited 4 days until it was the day...this day was Sunday the day she found out that her savior could erase her pain and give her a new name. She went to her new seat and the guy started to preach she cried and he said this was for you then he reached out his and said your savior still loves you.....this is her story......this is my story

Lies

The lies they cry from deep inside. They scream with pain as she cuts her vein,but she doesn't care. She pulls up her hair this might not stop the pain but it will stop the gain so she'll be skinner,and she probably won't eat dinner only cuz she wants to be thinner she won't be a winner cuz on the inner side she will commit suicide cuz she must die according to her mind thats the perfect story slide all because those lies make her cry.

Time is going bye-bye

When she cuts her wrists her mind splits she needs to forget the past she realizes that time isa ticking and her story is gunna be ending cuz it has to end and she has to fly high when she dies tonight cuz that is the ending to her story.

Her mind

She cant make up her mind weather to live or to die.

Its always on her mind.

She just wants to sit and cry,

All alone,

Living in this lie.

But she can't cry,

Cause she has to try,

Try to carry on,

Cause she is strong

And she will be STRONG. CAUSE NOTHING WILL EVER BE. WRONG

Memory

The memories

When you remind me of that memory. Something inside crushes me. I feel like i want to crumble and i fumble with my hands and turn them into fists. Cause that memory crushes me.

Stuck in 2015

Stuck in 2015

Most kids these days think there is no higher power above them. They do everything to glorify themselves. Kids are dating in second grade,girls starve them selves just to fit in.They're stuck in 2015. They want to gap their legs and cut away the pain deep in there arms. They drool over cute stars who dont know who they are. But all it is ,there stuck in 2015.